Maverick's Room {a work-in-progress post}

When Oakley was born, we brought him home to a fully furnished, beautifully designed, well-thought-out nursery. When we brought Mav home,  he slept in a laundry basket beside my bed for a month because his room was full of junk. I had pinned tons of inspiration pictures for his woodland themed nursery but we had just moved and I was a tad overwhelmed with two kids. 

Slowly, over time, I have added little details and organization and most of the junk is gone, or put in its rightful spot in our house, finally. It's still not 100% done but I was in there today and thought - "it's pretty cute in here". So here are just a few pictures of Mav's nursery. 

This is the norm lately - him crawling away from the camera! I can't seem to get him to sit still long enough! 

Just a short tour but hopefully things come together before his birthday ... Which is in a month! Ah! Time went fast. 

refreshed {a post from my mommy heart}

"But they who wait for the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not be faint." Isaiah 40:31

It's been a long couple of months for this mama. We are down to one vehicle because my husband got in an accident (not his fault ... He's okay!) back in early spring with our second vehicle, which we were actually borrowing from his parents, and is a whole other level of unfortunate, but something that doesn't need to be hashed out here. He leaves early in the morning and is off right as nap time ends so, all this to say, I'm at home all day, every day, without a car. At first it was exciting and refreshing, it was nice to have an excuse to stay home, rest, get stuff done. But now I'm all "get me OUTTA here!!" Being one-on-two with a toddler and baby is fun, exhausting and sometimes completely draining. I know that this motherhood thing is a calling of honour, and one that shouldn't be taken lightly but some days I'm just done with it, to be frank and completely honest. I work one day a week outside the home and it's been good but it's also been hard. I feel torn between two worlds, where I'm needed differently in each but one is so much more important and eternal.

I often hit the pillow at night thinking one or all of these things:

1 - WHEN does this get easier? 

2 - HOW do I do this better?

3 - is it even worth it to sleep? I could get so much done between now and M's first wake-up ... (I usually do decide to sleep, which is wise, since I turn into the Wicked Witch of the West when I'm low on sleep. Also a contributing factor to the whole weariness in motherhood thing?)

Tonight we got home from work, fed the kids and got them to bed ... All I wanted to do was collapse on the couch and watch ... The show I've been binge watching lately ... (it's Reba, okay? Don't judge me.) but I was drawn outside to my deck where the air was a wonderful temperature and I could sip tea without feeling hot or it going cold right away. I lit my citronella candle (because the mosquitoes this year are like BIRDS - seriously. They. Are. Huge!!) and opened my Bible. I usually do my quiet time during the boys' nap but evenings are a lot more relaxed because I know that, usually, they are down for a good stretch unlike nap time which is becoming increasingly unpredictable these days! And on Wednesdays I obviously am not home for nap time, I'm usually knee deep in some possession day prep for next week's turnovers around that time. 

I didn't read anything that spoke to any of my specific "issues" right now or seemed like a perfect fit for what I'm "going through" (side note, I went to hear a missionary from Africa speak last Saturday ... I don't feel like I can seriously say I'm going through anything when there aren't huge poisonous snakes lurking outside my house ...) but I finished the book I was reading and felt refreshed. Like a breath of air had filled up my weak and collapsed lungs and I was ready for the next couple days of being at home until Jordan gets home for the weekend. I was just so thankful that God's Word can do that, breathe life into dry and weary bones ... Even when you're not searching for anything in particular. Thank goodness He knows what I need. And this isn't to say that I've got this thing cased or won't ever fall into a slump or feel weary of persisting on in this mom life. But I feel confident in my God who will strengthen me and renew me when I just can't go on by myself. He's faithful and even though right now I can't see where He's going or taking me with this part of my life, I know that He is trustworthy. 

A few weeks ago I was reading during my quiet time after a particularly awful morning with my kids and he brought me to this verse in Galatians, which has become my theme verse and is the background on my phone as a constant reminder:

"And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up." 6:9

Trying to remind myself to not give up, it'll be worth it in the end. Another thing I've decided to start doing is keeping a gratitude journal, to keep my perspective and focus in the right spot. 

Today, I am so grateful for:

My support system of amazing family and wonderful friends. I always have someone to turn to when I'm feeling down or need a listening ear. I truly do have a village to raise these boys and I am so thankful. 

For times of refreshment on my deck after bedtime. 

And for a sweet little snippet of time to blog about it too ;) 

my evolution to "that hippie mom" {an earthy mom post}

Otherwise titled: "Who AM I??" 

When I was pregnant with O, we lived in a fourth-floor walk-up condo and I had very set opinions when it came to what kind of mom I would be. 

"Disposable diapers ALL THE WAY! I'm not trucking down two flights of stairs to wash my kid's dirty diapers. That's a) disgusting and b) WAY too much work!"

"Baby wearing confuses me. And it's kind of weird." 

"Buy ALL OF THE BABY PRODUCTS!" 

And it worked for us then. I probably wouldn't have stuck with cloth diapering and I felt like I held O way too much so wearing him wasn't really appealing. That was a different time, a different mind set. And I'll be honest - every time I nursed him I dreamt of bottle and formula feeding - just for a little bit of freedom. 

And I went into my pregnancy with M having the same convictions and opinions. But slowly, I was changing. 

It started with essential oils. A friend, also my boss, used them and we shared an office so I would constantly be hearing about how amazing they were, how they worked for this problem and that ailment. She invited me to go to an information night and I agreed, all the while telling Jordan how "hippie-dippy" this was and how could anyone ever spend that kind of money on something so hokey. 

Well. I had to eat my words coming home that night after buying the Family Starter Pack. Yeah. Turns out I love them. And they do work. They got me through those hard few weeks post-partum (along with other natural supplements and multivitamins) and helped with my kids' coughs and stuffy noses. Before I knew it, I was mixing up concoctions for my family to help with skin problems and other afflictions. I'm THAT woman. 

Once I had M, I realized that I didn't have enough hands, feet, extremities, to handle two children. O still needed a lot of attention and M would scream if I even THOUGHT of putting him down. (The horror!) So, I called my mom, we loaded up into her van and took our circus on the road to the local au-natural mama shop where I got a very detailed and informed lesson in baby-wearing and I bought a wrap carrier so I could have two hands and get things done while still snuggling my baby. And I loved it. A lot. We wore M a lot up until he was about 5 months when he got too big for it, so we've switched to a Bjorn until we learn a new carry position for bigger babies. (This wrap can go up to like 30 pounds and you can carry your baby on your back! How legit is that?!) But I still swear by baby wearing when it comes to grocery shopping with two kids. I honestly don't know what I would do without my carriers! 

Then came the cloth diapers. I was at Wal-Mart picking up {ANOTHER} box of diapers fort M and I looked at the price (admittedly, for the first time in a while) ... $40!!! I had to buy them, my baby needs diapers. How can Huggies charge me such an exorbitant amount of money for something required to take care of my child? Times two (because, yes, I have yet to potty train O ...)!! So the next time I saw my mother-in-law I interrogated her on cloth diapering. And after she gave me tons of info, she lent me hers. I was so nervous but hesitantly I started. And I fell in love. I can't even tell you why I love it so much. I just find it so fun. I love how M looks in only a cloth diaper and I wash them and happily stuff them every three days or so. I liked it so much I bought my own (in a different province, my BFF did the deal for me) and am just so excited to keep doing it. O won't wear them because they don't "feel" right but he's almost done (hopefully) with Pampers. But M is going to sport Bum Genius for as long as he'll let me. Plus. I put coconut oil on him instead of diaper rash cream. Yeah. This is the kind of thing I'm talking about, people. 

And to top it all off - I've been getting my kicks pinning garden ideas for this summer so I can plant a vegetable garden and "live off the land". Since when do I have a desire to plant ANYthing? 

Like I said ... WHO AM I? You guys. What's next for me? 

fiesta! {a party post}

My sister turned 21 this month. Twenty-one. Big year. 

I threw her a little fiesta one Sunday afternoon for a (gluten-free, dairy-free) lunch while my boys had a siesta. (See what I did there?) 

I sent invitations {in the mail!} and I was so excited about them. 

Then, the day after I dropped them in the mail box, I realized I put the wrong year on them AND forgot to put the location. Thank goodness for texting. #tiredmombrain 

Court wanted it to be simple ... I tried, I really did, but I just love details. So I collected jars and cans for eclectic flower vases, made a fringe banner and a flower crown for the birthday girl out of dollar store flora and fauna (just kidding, no small animals). I used a blanket that friends brought back from Peru and covered it with a clear cover for the table cloth. 

I had planned a lunch that was good for all the guests. But an hour before they were all set to arrive, the power went out! They all arrived and we decided to get gluten free pizza. Wouldn't you know it, as soon as Liz stepped out the door to go get it, the power was back! So I got to do my original meal:

Haystacks (with avocado-mango salsa)

Chips & guacamole (used Epicure guac mix)

Chile Chocolate Avocado Mousse

Strawberry Agua-Fresca 

Heavy on the avocados, I realized after I bought all the groceries. 

But it turned out okay. 

I also MAY have gone a little overboard on the gift wrap too. It involved a glue gun and left over flora. But it was so PREEEETTY!! 

Any way. It was super fun to do ... Even though I always get a little stressed before hosting people. I don't know why. But I feel bad for Jordan. He's right - it always turns out fine. 

Happy birthday to my little seeester. 

OLÉ!! 

sit {a quick post, as is any kind of sitting in this house}

I'm posting this today from my bed, under my covers, in the dark, in the middle of the day. I just woke up from a nap because - happy dance - the boys finally fell asleep at around the same time.

It's been one of those days ... Okay, weeks ... Where I've had a ton of "I can't do this" moments. I don't know why (I don't even really know how to define "this") but that very vague thought crosses my mind often. I know it's meant to ruin me, to test me and to convince me that a lie is true and that makes me even more tired than I already am. Battles of the mind are tricky ones and today, more than anything I just wanted a break from the crying and whining ... Oh, and that of the boys too! 

But right before nap time, we were all just hanging out in the living room. I love it in there because the sun comes in our big window and lights up an otherwise dim place. It's peaceful and sparse (as much as it can be with babies and toddlers around) and I was sitting there cross-legged just enjoying being with my babes. I snapped a picture because I wanted to remember that there truly are moments where I CAN do this. Where I enjoy this quickly passing time that everyone talks about but that some days can also feel like I'm trudging through molasses with a baby strapped to me and a two year old around my leg asking for treats. Even if it's not glitz and glam like all those Instagram accounts I follow (why do I do that to myself?) it's our tiny little adventure and I truly want to do it well. So maybe this is just a reminder to myself to sit ... To stop running around all the time and just drive toy cars over M's tummy or load them onto the trailer for O. And to keep fighting the battle, as hard as it may be, because it's worth it in the end.  

I'm just thankful for times to recharge {in the dark in the middle of the day} and hit the refresh button. Can I get a WHOOP WHOOP for nap time? I think we can all agree - it's the bomb-dot-com. 

terrariums {a "green thumb" post}

I've been seeing terrariums all over Pinterest these days and thought they looked so beautiful. After reading a couple tutorials on building your own, I decided it would be easy enough. So. I loaded up my boys and off to the Rona garden center we went! 

I got one of those cool carts that looks like a car but is pretty much impossible to steer, especially through the tiny garden center aisles. 

I found succulents and cacti and some soil that said "cactus" on it but that's where my success stopped. Charcoal was listed as a MUST as was sand and I couldn't find either. I was late for dinner at my parents' so I took my cacti, checked out and headed off, thinking I'd be back to find my charcoal. 

Well. Let me tell you. After two more trips (both Jordan and I went looking) I was feeling like my cacti were a waste of money. 

I did a bit more research and found out that I'd been looking in the wrong spot all along. Charcoal can be found at ... Wait for it ... 

THE PET STORE. Are. You. Kidding. Me. 

So I whipped over to Petsmart and found it all - charcoal (cleverly disguised as carbon), sand, moss. Everything a girl could want to build a terrarium. 

I had the rocks and fish bowls at home. Should have checked the size of the fishbowls first. But it worked out OK. Jordan and I built three tonight while catching up on Blue Bloods and even though they're not exactly what I was envisioning, they're pretty cute. We will have to do the other two another time when we have another container but for now I'm so happy to have some live greenery in my house. It adds something special in the middle of winter. 

However, our basement carpet now needs a super good vacuum! 

 

bag dump {a full on mom post}

Having two kids is going better than expected. I'm not a total mess (although I do have my days...) and O adapted pretty well to having M around. But boy oh boy do they need a lot of stuff. Especially both being in diapers.

One thing that I really love is having a well-stocked diaper bag. I have some essentials and some things that are nice to have. But with two kids there's a lot more to "stock" in there. So today I'm opening my diaper bag for all to see. I'll give you my "must-haves" and fill you in on the products I like best (not that I'm any sort of expert). Plus - who doesn't like seeing inside someone else's bag? I know I do. We're all snoops. Just admit it. 

My diaper bag is full to the brim - so much so that I'm wondering if I need a bigger one. Is that ok? To buy a bigger bag for more stuff? Or do I cut down on stuff? I'm a chronic over-packer so cutting down on the stuff I haul around scares me a little. We'll see ... I have a feeling the bigger bag will win out. Jordan even said I could get this one by Lily Jade. I'm undecided if it's worth the investment. Anyway. 

First off - a good bag that you will like toting everywhere. Mine is Coach (a gift from Jordan after O was born) and is pretty basic. Big pocket inside with a few little side pockets plus the two bottle holders on the outside. Does the job. 

Diapers & wipes (obviously) - Dollarama sells those Pampers 20-pack of wipes for $1.25!! I always pack WAY more diapers than I need. Maybe that's OK. 

Nursing cover, burp cloth & receiving blanket. My nursing cover is Bebe au Lait and I just use receiving blankets from Wal-Mart. I like the Bebe au Lait because it has the wire around the top so you can see what's going on in there without having to lift the cover. Very helpful for those first few weeks. 

Swaddling blanket - I always have an Aiden and Anais swaddler with me for on-the-go napping. I prefer the bamboo ones for the diaper bag because they are less stiff and take up less room than the regular muslin ones that I use at home. 

Change of clothes and drool bib for M. Just something simple in case of emergency (read: blowout). The drool bib was a gift and is Mom's Care. They come in packs of three and are SO cute. Right now it's nice to put one on M when we are out and other people are holding him - they catch spit-up really well! 

Water bottle & snacks for O. This. Is. Crucial. I cannot go anywhere without him asking for a snack. I usually bring the trifecta: yogurt covered raisins, granola bar & an apple sauce squeeze pack.  That will usually get us through a grocery shop. 

Baby Tylenol. Because that stuff rules. I should have bought stocks in it before having kids. And you never know when someone will be in need. 

Lip balm & gum. I usually do a three-point check before leaving the house. Teeth brushed? Make-up on? Deodorant? And, let's be real, I'm usually missing one of them. These little guys help me in time crunches! 

Sock-bun Donut. A gift from my sister in law. But again. Sometimes you just can't get everything in before leaving the house. This is basically a quick, pulled together hair-do on the go! 

Wallet & coupons (in the grey pouch). I'm just starting with the coupons but I think it'll come in handy for those times where we need to grab something quick. 

Mommy hook. This thing is a life saver. Go get one, even if you aren't a mom! 

Pens. They play a plethera of roles. But it's important to carry at least one! 

Hand sanitizer. (Again - obvious.) 

Extra soothers (in the soother pouch). For times when you lose THE one (or a friend needs one ... Had that happen before). 

Not pictured: bags for dirty diapers when you're not by a proper disposal site. Essential. And a changing pad. And band-aids. 

There you have it! Everything I take with me on a daily basis. If you ever need something - I probably have it!